When you think of self care what comes to mind? Brushing your teeth, showering a few times a week, maybe a little mud mask from Target once or twice a week?
But is that really self care? I mean isn’t that stuff we should all be doing anyways? Personal hygiene doesn’t count as self care in my book.
I know as a mom, I let taking care of my family and everyday tasks get in the way of taking care of myself. I’m to exhausted by 8pm to want to do anything else besides shower and cuddle – being a mom can be physically and mentally exhausting. All we do all day is think, plan and make things happen for everyone in our family. To make sure the kids and our significant others are happy and taken care of. Sure we ENJOY doing it. But, that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t stop a few hours a week and take time for ourselves.
What do I mean by taking time for our selves? Do something that gives you a mental stress relief. By yourself – no kids & no partner. Just you. Some people find it hard to be alone but, I look forward to me time every week. It’s time to clear your head and not think or worry about ANYTHING else in life.
You can walk on the beach or a nature trail. Go somewhere you love outdoors and read a book or write in a journal. Go to the gym or a yoga class a few times a week for an hour or two each time. Arts & crafts, photography or running? Go grab something to eat with a friend once a week or get your nails done.
Think. What kind of things did you enjoy doing before you had a family? Before you became responsible for other people & managed a home?
I personally love nature walks alone. Clear my mind take some photos of nature – explore new places without kids pulling me in different directions. Just being outside. I also like to journal almost every day – not much just 15-20 minutes to clear my head either in the mornings or later at night.
I love my family so much. I used to feel guilty for wanting to do things without them – I work 40 plus hours. I see the kids may 3-4 hours a day on the weekday and it’s not the real “quality time” I enjoy. Its hustling around getting ready for school in the mornings, then homework, dinner and baths at night. I thought me wanting time away was selfish & wrong considering I was away from them most the week.
That’s changed though. I get burnt out – I get frustrated and overwhelmed and then I don’t want to do any of the mom things that I normally don’t mind doing. Then I yell at the kids in frustration, get short with my boyfriend even though he didn’t do anything & I get mad at myself for acting out towards everyone. It’s horrible for everyone.
I realized a long time ago, I need alone time. I have no shame or guilt in admitting that anymore. Because parenting is hard. Parenting and working is exhausting. Parenting, working, going to school, keeping up a house and being a good partner – it sometimes feels impossible. A few times a week for an hour or two alone is more than OK.
No matter what your life routine is – you deserve time. How do you expect to take care of everything else in life if you don’t take care of yourself?
I hear moms now – How can I possibly find three or four hours every week for myself?
Remember we MAKE time for what we WANT to make time for. Make that time for yourself. Why would you not want to make time for yourself? It will only BENEFIT your family.
~Side note ~ remember to support your partners self love time too. They also work hard, get overwhelmed and need some alone time. You guys need time alone together, need time alone apart and time together with the family. It’s all about balance & supporting each other